The Singles Bar: 04/06/12

Shops, streets and pubs have been going Diamond Jubilee mad this weekend. But not here at The Singles Bar, oh no. We’ve got no bunting up, no Union Flags and no cucumber sandwiches. Instead, we’ve spent the entire festivities sitting in near darkness, listening to Generation Terrorists and ordering several copies of "The Idiot’s Guide To Starting A Republic". While we wait for those to drop through our letterbox though, we found time to cast an eye over ten new tracks available to purchase from today.

Perfume Genius – Dark Parts

A simple idea, yet one executed extremely well. Perfume Genius’ Dark Parts is built around simple, two-note piano oscillations and fragile, haunting vocals, and it’s certainly effective. The way it builds up for the first two minutes gets at your emotions and is really quite majestic. The downside, however, is that the last minute or so is pretty superfluous, and all the momentum and feeling that had been previously built up is lost. It’s a real shame, because otherwise Dark Parts would be a wonderful track, reminiscent of Regina Spektor at her best. 7/10

Gotye – Eyes Wide Open

It seems that Gotye’s plan to take over the entire world continues apace. There’s a travelling, chugging quality to Eyes Wide Open, which was actually originally released in Australia over eighteen months ago. It’s not as irritating as Somebody That I Used To Know, but that’s hardly a recommendation. On Spotify, Gotye’s filed alongside Foster The People and Fun., which seems about right; groups who are just sort of there, don’t do much, and their music doesn’t really excite yet sells in industrial quantities. This probably wouldn’t be a hit if it were by an artist without much commercial success, but since it’s the STIUTK guy, this will sell regardless. 3/10

Maximo Park – Hips And Lips

It’s difficult to believe that Maximo Park’s debut album, A Certain Trigger, was released over seven years ago. Sadly, they haven’t managed to recapture that vital, engrossing feeling since, and Hips And Lips won’t be changing that. It’s a perfectly listenable track, but doesn’t have the wit and invention you’d expect from Maximo Park, and Paul Smith’s vocals sound positively disinterested for the most part. The refrain of, “You’re a puzzle to me / And you always will be”, harks back to better days for the band but like so many before them, it seems they said all they had to say with their first record. 5/10

Marcus Collins – Mercy

Recent X Factor runner-up, Marcus Collins, follows the formula set in place by his reworking of White Stripes’ Seven Nation Army. Namely, a big voice, big horns and a kind of watered-down, gutless approximation of classic soul and the Motown sound. He’s clearly singing like his life depends on it and although that’s sounds extreme, on the evidence of this track, his career might well be hanging in the balance. A bizarre arrangement and style that’s completely out of kilter with everything in modern pop and a song that someone forgot to write a chorus for. Oh dear. 2/10

Hot Chip – Night And Day

With each passing year, musical trends seem to get closer and closer to what electronic group Hot Chip have been doing for ages. The vocals of frontman Alexis Taylor may be an acquired taste, but Night And Day should be thoroughly enjoyed by everyone. It has that elusive quality that leads you to the dancefloor, an urgent twitch, and a fantastic 80s-inspired breakdown after the chorus. Due to their appearance, Hot Chip are often written off as a merely academic proposition, but Night And Day just reaffirms what’s always been the case – they’re an under-the-radar treasure capable of writing phenomenal pop songs. 9/10

DJ Fresh feat. Dizzee Rascal – The Power

It really illustrates where the UK music industry is at the moment that a drum n’ bass producer, unheralded outside of his chosen field for a dozen years, can now be releasing a new single off the back of consecutive Number Ones. The inclusion of Dizzee Rascal makes me nervous though – commercial success has turned Dizzee from an era-defining MC with grit to a party-chasing pop star. However, the fact remains that Dizzee is enormously charismatic, and his rhymes transform an otherwise average-quality dance track into something much more memorable. He’s still only concerned with having a good time, and the fear remains that he’ll soon jump the shark, but for now, both Dizzee Rascal and DJ Fresh are on top of the world. 7/10

Coldplay feat. Rihanna – Princess Of China

Looking back at previous Singles Bars, it’s been a whole week since RiRi’s been involved in a new track, so it’s high time she was featured again. From the moment it was announced she was teaming up with Coldplay, the resulting track had ‘single’ written all over it, whatever the musical result. Like much of Mylo Xyloto, Princess Of China has a more electronic, experimental edge than Coldplay’s previous work. Cheap-sounding synths pulse in Princess Of China’s verses and the vocal hook has Coldplay’s trademark earworm quality. Despite being potentially a pointless exercise, having a distinct female vocal works well in a Coldplay track, and provides a welcome contrast to the sound of Chris Martin, who’s never the most appealing of singers. Between these two, they could keep the world powered just through the rage of their legions of haters, but they certainly do what they do very well. 7/10

Usher – Scream

After the failure (or at least, by his standards) of the lurching Climax, it’s interesting to see what Usher will do next. Unfortunately, after showing signs of breaking free of the dance/R&B template, it’s back to business as usual for Mr. Raymond with Scream. There’s a lot of “Woo! Baby, baby!”, big beats and allusions to that place where so much chart music is based: the club. Usher’s been making hits for over fifteen years now, but this could be any of the artists that followed in his wake (Ne-Yo, Chris Brown), and it’s disheartening to see him following rather than leading. If you find yourself enjoying this track, hit yourself in the head with a frying pan and go and listen to Climax instead. 1/10

Chris “Kammy” Kamara – Sing 4 England

England’s disastrous Euro 2012 campaign begins next week, and it appears this is the team’s official song. For the uninitiated, Chris Kamara is a former professional footballer who is now a commentator and, let’s be honest, figure of fun for his hugely enthusiastic style and uncanny knack of getting things wrong. So yes, he’s absolutely no business making a record. Despite his persona, this track is, bizarrely, played completely straight, which seems like a huge opportunity missed. Like the vast majority of football records, it’s insipid, lumpen and jingoistic, and it’s hard to believe anybody could be inspired by this turgid mess of a record. 1/10

The Beach Boys – That’s Why God Made The Radio

Is anything about this a good idea? Seminal band with mentally damaged genius at the helm put out new material for the first time in who-knows-how-long. You almost don’t want to listen to it because it could spoil so many memories but… it’s utterly fantastic. No, really, it is. It’s a little slow to get going, but once you’re at the first chorus, those harmonies come in and they sound just as heart-meltingly marvellous as they always have. Shameless nostalgia, perhaps, but there are few sounds on this earth as life-affirming and beautiful as The Beach Boys’ harmonies, and the relief that this song is so good is almost overwhelming. It’s no God Only Knows, or Good Vibrations, or Heroes And Villains. Hell, it’s not even In My Room or Wouldn’t It Be Nice, but against all the odds, it’s a triumphant return and the sound of the sun bursting through the clouds. 9/10 – SINGLE OF THE WEEK

Top Ten UK #1 Singles of the Last Ten Years

This is the second of the two list articles to celebrate No Ripcord's tenth birthday...

When No Ripcord first launched in April 1999, sitting at the top of the pile in the singles chart was the début release by Westlife, Swear It Again. Well, here we are ten years later, No Ripcord is thriving and Westlife... well, unfortunately they’re still going too, and the talentless Irish chancers have in fact had 14 UK #1 singles to date. We all know that the singles charts aren’t what they used to be (especially since the demise of Top of the Pops) and that the best songs never make it to the summit. However, over the past decade, there have been enough diamonds in the rough to ensure that the charts are worth checking out of a Sunday evening. So, here are the best ten:

10. Michael Andrews feat. Gary Jules: Mad World (2003)

Haunting, ethereal, sparse; a song like this would barely get in the charts these days, let alone make it to number one. Taken from the soundtrack to the film Donnie Darko, this song was a complete word-of-mouth hit. It took the much-coveted Christmas Number One title in 2003 following various campaigns in the media. It also represented a sea change for the UK charts, as this was the last Christmas Number One not affiliated with a charity or television talent show. This was the last occurrence of when being at the head of the charts over the festive season still held some prestige. Since this hit, both Andrews and Jules have faded back into obscurity, with neither making it into the UK charts since.

9. Eminem feat. Dido: Stan (2000)

If we can conveniently forget the fact that this song lead directly to Dido’s brand of aural wallpaper being an enormous success, we can begin to appreciate this track. An obsessive fan who kills himself and his girlfriend in a car crash is not a typical subject for a hit single but then again, Eminem was never your typical pop star. His latter efforts may have simply been either cartoon hip-hop-lite or angry, bitter diatribes, but Stan is his masterpiece. A genuinely harrowing tale that was never intrusive, insensitive or sought to gain humour inappropriately from its dark subject matter, it’s a story more than a song and remains far and away his best work. It was deposed from top slot on the charts by Bob the Builder with Can We Fix It? It didn’t seem right, really.

8. Beyoncé: Crazy In Love (2003)

This isn’t really a song, it’s more of a riff – that riff. The pounding drums are the perfect foil for the brass hook that makes Crazy In Love so memorable. The riff in question isn’t even original; it’s taken from Are You My Woman (Tell Me So) by The Chi-Lites. Whoever spotted that and came up with the idea is a genius. It’s easy to forget that before this song, Beyoncé wasn’t quite the all-conquering star she is today and her first single (Work It Out) had under-performed. This transformed her and it’s easy to see why. We don’t care about the lyrics, the melody, the sentiment, hell, even Jay-Z’s rap is fairly lacklustre in comparison. You just need the “oh-oh oh-oh” part before each verse and the riff... that riff.

7. Robyn with Kleerup: With Every Heartbeat (2007)

Robyn was actually around making records in the 1990s, and she was rubbish. That may seem a tad harsh, but her songs were anodyne, ‘nothing’ songs that left your head as soon as they’d entered your ear. For those of us with long memories (and a slightly unhealthy interest in pop music), it was a surprise to have her back a couple of years ago. The real surprise though, was that she was capable of a shimmering pop classic such as this. It has electronic bleeps and exudes a certain cool that only the Scandinavians seem to be able to pull off. It appears restrained, but repeated listens reveal the yearning behind each word. With Every Heartbeat may have not been a worldwide smash, but it showed that the UK record-buying public do occasionally know what they’re doing.

6. The Streets: Dry Your Eyes (2004)

Before the release of Dry Your Eyes, Mike Skinner was just a Brummie chronicling the life of a geezer. The release of his second album, A Grand Don’t Come For Free, had garnered much critical acclaim but the masses remained resistant to his charms and he seemed destined to remain that bloke who talked over music. This all changed over the summer of 2004 – after England were dumped out of the European Football Championships, Dry Your Eyes played over the closing credits and gave football fans a soundtrack to their anguish. (For those of you reading outside the UK, this really happens. Twenty stone men with tattoos on their neck break down and weep when England lose at football). A poignant lament to a lost love, what really makes this track is the keen observation of the minutiae and the sense of loss and despair. It proved to be the tipping point for The Streets, as Skinner has struggled to repeat the success of his defining moment, but it could be worse... c’mon, dry your eyes, mate.

5. Gnarls Barkley: Crazy (2006)

Danger Mouse and Cee-Lo made chart history with Crazy, their début release and the biggest selling song of 2006 in the UK. It became the first single to reach the top of the charts on downloads alone and still remained number one even after having been physically deleted. However, such feats are no guarantee of quality, as the successes of singles by Bryan Adams and Wet Wet Wet prove. Luckily, Gnarls Barkley had produced a cracker. Cee-Lo had been a moderately successful solo artist and Danger Mouse was producer du jour but still, no-one could have predicted this. Built around a sample of Last Man Standing by Gian Franco and Gian Piero Reverberi, Crazy is everything a good pop song should be: direct, energetic, catchy and not too long. Simultaneously haunting and invigorating, Crazy was pretty much universally adored and like several others in this list, the authors have been victims of their own success, with Gnarls Barkley struggling to repeat the sales or levels of critical acclaim since.

4. Girls Aloud: The Promise (2008)

At the risk of alienating the entire readership of No Ripcord, this song fully deserves it place on the list. Girls Aloud have proved since their inception that their songs are a cut above other girl groups (who wrote the songs themselves is a moot point) and this is the best of the lot. Now, unless you grew up in a hippie household where your parents played Captain Beefheart’s Trout Mask Replica over Sunday lunch, the chances are the first music you loved as a child was what is known as manufactured pop. However much your tastes change and develop, there’s always a part of your brain susceptible to the pull of this sort of music. Admittedly, it’s normally more prevalent with the influence of alcohol, but there should be no shame in holding your hands up and proclaiming you like this song. And really, what’s not to like? There’s shimmering harmonies, shades of 60s girl-groups, touches of Spector and a chorus that sounds like the theme tune to Blankety Blank. Go on, treat yourself.

3. Dizzee Rascal featuring Calvin Harris and Chrome: Dance Wiv Me (2008)

It would appear that despite the flagging singles industry, last year was a pretty good one for chart-toppers. Like The Streets, Dizzee had always been more popular with the critics than the public, and had struggled to convert his Mercury win (for début Boy in Da Corner) into actual sales. This is his finest moment so far though, effortlessly providing a perfect mix of grime and laid-back dance that it’s hard to resist. Maybe Dizzee’s gritty rhymes about urban life were too unpalatable for the music-buying public at large, but on Dance Wiv Me, it’s fun-time Dizzee as he just focuses on having a good time. Trying to chat up a girl in front of her boyfriend has never seemed so attractive or enjoyable.

2. Manic Street Preachers: The Masses Against the Classes (2000)

Hey, remember when MSP were angry and overtly-political? Well, poster-boy of that era, Richey Edwards, may have disappeared in 1995 but The Masses Against the Classes proved that MSP still had the edge that made 1994’s The Holy Bible so brutal and compelling. The whole story behind the song is trademark Manics: no promotion and deletion of the single on the day of release, yet it was the first #1 single of the new millennium. As for the track itself, it starts with a quotation by Noam Chomsky and ends with one from Camus. It’s abrasive punk rock, it’s thrilling, it’s exciting and it reminds you of the sheer power and influence that popular music can have. In retrospect, this may have been simply a token gesture, as MSP have never released anything like this as a single since, and have slowly transformed into a fairly sedate AOR band. But these three and a half minutes are a clear indicator of how important the Manic Street Preachers have been over the last twenty years.

1. Arctic Monkeys: I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor (2005)

A cursory glance at the singles chart will tell you that – with a few notable exceptions – pop music is a young person’s game. Artists can never quite recapture that moment when they burst onto the scene, and that “shock of the new” is none more clear than on this single. Regardless of your age, this song can instantly transport you back to being 16 and full of hormones and let’s face it, regardless of your age, your memory will tell you that the best pop music was made when you were in your teens. This song is dripping with yearning and lust and beneath it all hides the promise of something more sinister. There hadn’t been regional accents in successful pop for a while, but Alex Turner’s rich Sheffield brogue changed all that. The sub-3 minutes of pop heaven is best described by the 21st Century’s most exciting lyricist himself: “There ain’t no love, no Montagues or Capulets/Just banging tunes and DJ sets and/Dirty dancefloors and dreams of naughtiness.” That is all that’s good about pop music encapsulated in just a few simple lines – will a number one single ever be as good as this again?