The Singles Bar - 29/8/11

The last Monday in August is a bank holiday in the UK. That means it’s a perfect opportunity for friends, family and loved ones to convene, to enjoy each other’s company and for summer to have one last hoorahbefore the chilly embrace of autumn intervenes. I spent today sitting in my flat, alone, listening to the new singles that have been made available to buy. This probably says more about me than I’d care to admit.

Anyway, here are the tracks and this week, there’s even a Spotify playlist containing them all to accompany the article. Enjoy!

Owl City – Deer In The Headlights

Owl City have certainly attracted their fair share of controversy on these pages, most notably in AndrewBaer’s review of their most recent album. Personally, I find them too bland to get too worked up about, andDeer In The Headlights won’t do anything to change that. It’s a passable effort that starts off sounding like the 90210 theme tune. It’s a bit Postal Service-lite and the lyrics are a little trite, but it’s inoffensive enough to attract lots of fans. Not for me though, oh, and by the way, the animal you’re looking for is a rabbit, not a deer. 4/10

Cults – Go Outside

Only time will tell if Cults make the breakthrough their critical reception predicts, but Go Outside has certainly been getting a lot of airplay in the UK. It’s a very 2011 sounding record, by which I mean there are elements of shoegaze, dream-pop and a kind of ethereal sheen over the whole thing. It has a strong melody, a glockenspiel prettily echoing the vocal line and is exceptionally catchy. The breakdown halfway through is haunting yet it still retains a sunshine feel. Oddly enough, it doesn’t seem to have any verses. What’s it about? Oh, I’ve no idea, going outside probably. 9/10 – SINGLE OF THE WEEK

The Feeling – A Hundred Sinners (Come and Get It)

The Feeling are another act it’s difficult to have strong feelings about either way due to their sheer dullness. Some of the songs from their first record had a tendency to get stuck in your head but this is instantly forgettable and shows a real lack of ambition. Critics seem to find it easy to put the boot into AOR bands (unfairly, in my opinion), but this is a good deal worse than Supertramp, ELO et al. The most interesting thing about this song was when my listening was interrupted halfway through by a cold caller. Uninspiring, insipid stuff. 2/10

Panic! At The Disco – Let’s Kill Tonight

I really can’t make my mind up about P!ATD. On one hand, they’re attached to that annoying emo movement, but on the other hand, they’ve written one or two decent songs, and I’m prepared to give kudos to any band with punctuation in their name. Let’s Kill Tonight starts promisingly, with healthy daubs ofelectronica, but the chanting chorus is a little flat. In fact, the electro squeals over the chorus sound like a cross between the guitar solo at the end of November Rain and the music to the Mystic Cave zone from Sonic 2 on the MegaDrive (or Genesis, if you’re one of those American types). No mean feat, but this isn’t quite the track it could have been. 6/10

Cover Drive – Lick Ya Down

Some (very) brief research tells me that Cover Drive are a Bajan group who are on the verge of moving to London having signed a deal with Polydor. Lick Ya Down is an ill-advised attempt to mix Euro house, Caribbean rhythms and airhorns. There are shades of Rihanna, Ke$ha and Nicki Minaj, but Cover Drive never come close to matching any of that illustrious trio. The message of the song appears to be that they are, in fact, going to “lick ya, lick ya down, lick ya, lick ya down, down, down,” which I’m not really sure I’m particularly enthusiastic about. Incidentally, one of Cover Drive performs under the name of Bar-Man, which is apt as it’s sure to be his occupation in the near future. 3/10

Kaiser Chiefs – Man On Mars

You never know quite what you’re going to get with Kaiser Chiefs. Man On Mars starts with an Asian-sounding riff, sure to herald the start of something big, yet it never quite arrives. There are some nice chord changes, a few soaring moments, but the lack of a killer chorus is the song’s Achilles’ heel. It’s difficult to imagine this is the same group who wrote the raucous I Predict A Riot. Completely fine as an album track,Man On Mars is an odd choice of single and unlikely to win the band many new fans. 5/10

Bruno Mars – Marry You

As Bruno Mars is responsible for The Lazy Song – possibly the first song it took less time to write than it does to listen to – my hopes weren’t high for this. Although I like Mars’ description of alcohol as “dancing juice,” Marry You is far from recommended. Despite strong vocals, there’s a lack of spark in the production, and the inclusion of church bells is disappointingly predictable. However, when all’s said and done, Bruno Mars has now released four solo singles, and this is the least murder-inducingly irritating of the lot. 4/10

Theme Park – A Mountain We Love

I don’t know about you, but if I were starting a band, I’d make sure I picked a name which was distinctive and likely to make my group come top in any Google searches. London quartet Theme Park have, however, eschewed such common sense, the scoundrels. A Mountain We Love wastes no time getting started, and is a head-nodding slice of new-wave electro that proudly wears its 80s influences on its sleeve. There are interesting sounds dotted throughout the track (including a kind of synth steel drum) and the twin lead vocals really work well. It could do with being taken up a notch – there’s little change in the song from start to finish – but it’s a pretty damn good effort and certainly worthy of your time. 8/10

Nicole Scherzinger – Wet

On Wet, Nicole Scherzinger sings, “Let’s get a little wet, I like the way you work it,” “If you touch me there, please beware, you can start up a fire” and other not-at-all-disguised sexual innuendos. Actually, to call them innuendos would be to credit the lyrics with some sort of invention, which would be wrong. This depressing slice of porno-pop sounds like a barrel is being scraped, which is apt as it’s the fourth single from her debut album and the well of inspiration looks like it’s run dry (unlike Scherzinger herself, it would appear). Earlier singles like Poison and Don’t Hold Your Breath are infinitely better than this tired attempt at dance. If you’re planning on drinking too much and cavorting with a stranger in the suffocating atmosphere of a club, there are far superior soundtracks. 1/10

Katy B – Witches Brew

I’m a big fan of Katy B and her debut album, On A Mission, but I question the logic of releasing a sixth single from it. Presumably it’s a final promotional push before next week’s Mercury Prize, for which On A Mission has been nominated. From the brilliant punning title onwards, Witches Brew is a fantastic track - a stunning mix of pop and dubstep, with bonkers production and an electrifying chorus. Back in April, Ipredicted that Katy B had made the pop record of 2011 and it’s tracks like Witches Brew that back up such a claim. It’s just a shame that the record’s been spliced apart; half of the tracks are now available as singles. This is an odd one really – a fantastic song, but one that should never really have been a single in the first place. 8/10

Jessie J – Who’s Laughing Now

The answer to the question posed in the title of this track is presumably Island Records, who have seen Jessie J’s album, Who You Are, go double-platinum in the UK. The start of Who’s Laughing Now is similar to Snoop Dogg’s Drop It Like It Hot, but it soon transforms into a grating, solipsistic car-crash of a record.Who’s Laughing Now is smug, whiny, soulless, disposable music, engineered with the sole intention of commerce. It also contains a horrific rap which features the line, “Oh my God, babe, your voice is, like,wow.” I’m a mild-mannered sort and have nothing against Jessie J personally, but I despise everything about her music and everything she stands for in an artistic sense. Thanks to that internet thing, I understand Jessie J performed at the VMAs last night. I’d like to say that, America, on behalf of the UK, I sincerelyapologise. And while we’re on the subject, sorry about Piers Morgan too. 0/10

Ed Sheeran – You Need Me, I Don’t Need You

What is it with UK artists being confrontational and hell-bent on proving their “realness.” There’s the aforementioned Jessie J, Cher Lloyd confronting “haters” on Swagger Jagger and now Ed Sheeran, who’s very keen for us to know he “didn’t go to BRIT School” and, slightly more bafflingly, that he’s “not fake, don’t ever call me Daisy.” If you didn’t hear Daisy Sheeran’s previous single, The A Team, it was an ode to a companion succumbing to drug addiction, sung to the tune of Hey There Delilah with lyrics written by someone who’d ingested a rhyming dictionary. Either that, or the faces of junkies really are “crumbling likepastries.” You Need Me, I Don’t Need You is, if anything, even worse, with its acoustic hip-hop like ananaemic Beck and Daisy going to enormous lengths to prove to the world what a prize chump he really is. There are several candidates for the nadir of this song (and perhaps, all of recorded music), but ladies and gentleman, thank you for reading today and I shall leave you with this, a line which makes me never want to listen to music ever again – “They say I’m up and coming like I’m fucking in an elevator.” 0/10

Wireless Festival 2011

The Wireless Festival isn’t really a festival at all. Festivals bring to mind tents, roll-mats, queues to get off the motorway and a part of the world you’d never normally visit. Wireless Festival takes place in the middle of Hyde Park in London – you’ve probably heard of it. It’s ludicrously easy to get to (there’s a tube station about a minute from the entrance) and there’s no camping allowed. As a result, Wireless cleverly puts on three completely different days of music. Friday was pop day, Saturday was dance day and Sunday was alternative day.

I gain entrance to the park and found the Janelle Monáe set already in full swing on the main stage. She may not have been around for too long, but she knows how to play a crowd like an industry veteran. There was dancing, crowd-surfing, call and response, and a bizarre moment where the band descended to a hush while Janelle encouraged the whole audience to sit on the floor. She was backed by a frighteningly competent band who seemed to be having just as much fun as the audience and whose dance moves were expertly choreographed. Reportedly, after her performance at the Glastonbury Festival was televised, sales of Janelle Monáe’s album, The ArchAndroid, rose 5,000%. Having seen her at Wireless, it’s not the least bit surprising.

Such a great opening meant next act, Katy B, had a lot to live up to. Eyebrows were raised earlier this year when I awarded her debut album, On A Mission, 9/10 on No Ripcord, but it’s a rating I still stand by months later. However, Katy B’s live performance came across slightly flat. Jumping up and down a bit and employing the tired trope of having some guy shout, “make some NOISE!” over half the lyrics isn’t the most engaging thing in the world. When you’ve just seen Janelle Monáe cover The Jackson Five with dancers dressed as Everton mints, you’re on a hiding to nothing really. Katy B’s idea of getting the crowd hyped may work in a dark club at 2am, but on a balmy June afternoon, it sadly doesn’t hit the spot.

The last two years have seen me rediscover my love of pop, but I still hadn’t actually seen an out and out chart pop act in a live setting. That’s why I was really quite looking forward to seeing Ke$ha. I wasn’t particularly familiar with her oeuvre but the subject matter of her songs soon became clear: drinking, partying and sex. Subtlety is clearly not in the Ke$ha dictionary – any time there was a line that may or may not have been a sexual advance, she’d point to her crotch, just to make sure there wasn’t any doubt. We were invited to go in her “glovebox” and told there was “a slumber party in my basement” while all around me, the crowd seemed to know every single word. Overcoming my initial bafflement, I got completely swept up in the euphoria and, despite it being the trashiest experience of my life so far, had an absolute riot. Say what you like about Ke$ha but she knows how to put on a show. It’s not often you see someone pretend to tear the limbs off their dancers and proceed to drink the blood from their heart. Towards the end, she shouted, “London! There’s one problem! There’s not enough glitter ON MY TITS!” The crowd roared and dancers in hot pants were deployed to add sparkle to her décolletage. You don’t get this sort of thing at your average Fleet Foxes gig.

Like Janelle Monáe before her, the sheer showmanship of Ke$ha meant that the next act were almost inevitably going to be a disappointment. The unlucky people this time round were Canadian electrofunk duoChromeo. Their keyboard stands looked like ladies’ legs in high heels, they had a talkbox and… that was about it in terms of interesting aspects of Chromeo’s set. After twenty minutes of music that had my attention wandering, it was decided that a pint of overpriced lager in a paper cup and a kangaroo burger were a more enticing prospect.

It’s often the case that you can feel completely outside of a movement. The popularity of an artist confuses you, not just because you don’t connect with their music, but because you’ve barely heard of them and it’s a shock to find out just how popular they are. This is what happened to me when I stumbled into Devlin’s set. The crowd were going crazy for Devlin’s freestyle MCing, but to me it just recalled the dark days of UK hip-hop before Dizzee Rascal and Roots Manuva broke through. I was half expecting him to bring out Mark B and Blade for a guest spot, but instead he brought out Ed Sheeran. Ed Sheeran is a ruddy-faced urchin who’s recently had a big hit in the UK with The A Team. However, I’ve no idea why, as he displayed all the talent and originality of a busker on the London Underground.

So, as has probably been covered in enough detail, I was left cold by Devlin and when he departed, my friends and I (including top NR scribe Craig Stevens) went to the front of the stage anticipating Battles. Poor, poor Battles. After setting up all their equipment, they launched into their opening number, only to immediately blow the speakers. An apology followed, as did twenty minutes or so of panicked roadies frantically turning things off and on again. It became clear we weren’t going to get a song any time soon, so props to drummer John Stanier who did his utmost to keep the crowd entertained with a marathon drum solo. Clearly no-one goes to a show to see a drum solo, but the audience were patient and we received more apologies from the group. Eventually, the band started playing, but only had time for two songs and it was clear something still wasn’t quite right. They were granted an extension and soldiered on for one more track, which still didn’t quite hit the spot. Battles left the stage to sympathetic applause, telling us, “we owe you a proper show next time,” but it was hard not to feel disappointed. Poor Battles.

After Battles’ departure, it wasn’t long before the stage was lit an eerie shade of red and full of space-age mixing desks. A giant net loomed in front of the crowd, on to which numbers were being projected. It all appeared to make no sense, which was completely to be expected as I was awaiting the arrival of Aphex Twin. A ripple of applause broke out, a silhouette made its way behind the mixing desk, and a bass note was played at the kind of volume and frequency which made my internal organs scream. A bit more ear-bleed tomfoolery occurred and then he broke out into Windowlicker, and the party really started. Unfortunately, the problem with Aphex Twin is that he makes dance music that’s impossible to dance to. This is fine at home, but in a big, sweaty tent, you’re in the mood for some communal swaying. Quarter of an hour in, I had an epiphany. He won’t even show his face, he’s being wilfully difficult and the potential fight next to me featuring a shove-happy stoner and the world’s most Cockney man is more interesting to me than the music, therefore I’m off. And leave the tent I did, not that the silly, beardy fool would have cared one jot.

This is the bit where I tell you all about the headliners, The Chemical Brothers. However, a combination of beer, bad timing and my kidneys (personally, I blame Aphex Twin) meant I found myself stranded from my friends on the edge of a heaving mass of people, with no way of getting back in. Twenty minutes into the Chemical Brothers set, they’d played one hit, I was too far away to get the real atmosphere, and I was frazzled from a whole day of music.

Remember I mentioned just how easy it is to get to Wireless Festival? It also means it’s incredibly easy to leave. So, call me a slacker, call me a quitter, call me a lightweight if you like, but I’ve never been a massive Chemical Brothers fan so I was happy to slink off into the evening unchallenged. I’d had a great day, but from my point of view, the best acts were all done and dusted by 5pm. I’d certainly go again next year though – when summer comes, that combination of good music, the open air and being with your friends is hard to beat.

On A Mission

Katy B - On A Mission
released 4 April 2011 on Sony

Sometimes it can be hard to keep up with all the musical genres and sub-categories that are knocking around. For those of you who like your music ordered neatly, Kathleen Brien – better known as Katy B – fits into the box labelled “UK funky.” If you don’t know what UK funky is, you could always ask Katy herself, as she wrote an essay on the subject while studying for a degree in popular music. I’m no expert myself, but presumably it’s different to US funky, which I imagine to primarily consist of Bootsy Collins, George Clinton and Nile Rodgers jamming non-stop for three days aboard a spaceship made entirely of hallucinations.

Anyway, Katy B is a very different proposition; she’s been providing guest vocals for underground tracks since the age of sixteen and has been heavily supported by former pirate station, Rinse FM. She gate-crashed the UK Top 5 late last year with her calling card, Katy On A Mission, and there’s been no stopping her since.

 

On A Mission is the sound of the dancefloor being brought to the pop charts. In fact, it could even be labelled a concept album in the loosest possible sense, as it has a theme running through it of a big night out. Stylistically, there are plenty of nods to dance music trends of the last twenty years, most notably the breakbeat of the 1990s and the formerly ubiquitous sound of UK garage from the early 21st Century. Thankfully, Katy B brings more to the table than the irritating two-step beat that was unavoidable a decade or so ago. Credit must go to the production team behind On A Mission, as it is they (Geeneus, Benga, Zinc, Artwork and Skream) who elevate the album from merely “good” to “great.”

 

Opener Power On Me isn’t anything to write home about, but the album really bursts into life with aforementioned single, Katy On A Mission. It’s a song that expertly captures the thrilling moment when you enter a club and the sheer force of the music completely envelops you. Katy B’s clipped, English tones (listen as she sings, “I try to push past but he wants to play”) contrast perfectly with the bass-heavy, dubby production of Benga. On A Mission deftly mines non-commercial genres and repackages them for crossover success; there’s a very strong pop, radio-friendly vibe running through the record, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t room for experimentation and fresh ideas. The marvellously-titled Witches Brew throws oscillating bleeps around with some huge bass and Magnetic Man collaboration Perfect Stranger is uncompromising dubstep.

 

From Katy On A Mission’s start-of-the-night feel, we move to unwanted attention and rubbish potential hook-ups (Why You Always Here and the effortless Movement) all the way through to the closing of the club, Lights On, which features Mercury winning Ms. Dynamite. It’s a joyous track about not wanting the night to end, and the wish to keep dancing once the club lights come up. Seeing as the UK hasn’t had a decent female urban star since Ms. Dynamite’s halcyon days, this song could also be viewed as a symbolic passing of the baton.

 

We’ll neatly sidestep the insipid Easy Please Me with its terrible opening line of “Standing at the bar with my friend, Olivia,” and conveniently move onto final track, Hard To Get. We’ve gone out, had a drink and a dance, made it to closing time, survived the night bus, and Hard To Get is the post-club comedown. It’s languid and sexy funk, with horn stabs and sultry vocals, and an ideal way to end both an evening and the album. As if to let you know we’re at the end, Katy B does her album “thankyous” towards the end of the song, finally thanking the listener for “joining me on my mission.” She then puts on an endearingly silly voice, and collapses into laughter. It may seem an insignificant moment, but it shows Katy B’s one of us. She might be a star now, but she’s just the girl next door who lives to go out and have a good time. What could have been an unspectacular let-down of an album has become a triumphant pop masterclass that’s likely to soundtrack many a good time this year.

 

On A Mission has plenty for the charts, plenty for the dancefloors and plenty for people who take their music a bit more seriously. Katy B could be loved by everyone and she probably deserves to be; after all, she’s just made the pop record of 2011.